He wags his tail, and the room looks as if a devastating army had marched through it.  ~Jerome K. Jerome

A dog wags its tail with its heart.  ~Martin Buxbaum

No matter how little money and how few possessions you own, having a dog makes you rich.  ~Louis Sabin

No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does.  ~Christopher Morley 

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.  ~Aldous Huxley

If a dog were your teacher, you would learn that if what you want lies buried, then you should dig until you find it.  ~Anonymous

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.  ~Robert Benchley

The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.  ~Samuel Butler

One man’s trash is another dog’s treasure.  Dogs have fewer taste buds than humans.  Their taste is not refined and they don’t concern themselves with germ theory.  ~Marc-Christophe

You know you're a dog person when...

• You have more dog beds, chew toys, collars, leashes, harnesses, and dog crates than you have dogs.

• You meet other people with dogs, and remember their dog's call name after 30 seconds, but don't get the owner/handler's name until you've met them 2 or 3 times.

• You don't think twice about trading licks of an ice cream cone with your dog.

• Your parents give up on grandchildren and start to refer to your dogs as "your kids" or your children." (Bonus: they start to call them "our granddogs.")

• 90 percent of your Internet connection time goes to the dogs (seeing what's new when you enter your breed into the browser, reading up on multiple lists, checking out photos, sounds and FAQs, etc.).

• You have hundreds of pictures of your dogs on your desk at work, in your wallet, etc., but none of your family or yourself.

• No one wants to ride in your car because they know they'll get dog hair on their clothes.

• You reach into your pockets for change, and liver treats, dog kibble, and pick-up bags fall all over. (Bonus: You've done this in a classy establishment.)

• You've had long meaningful discussions with your friends on the best way to trim your dog's nails, but have never had a manicure or pedicure in your lifetime.

• Books and movies are ruined for you if the dog references are incorrect.

• The highlight of your day is spending time with your dog.

• You watch simply awful movies because your breed is either featured in a cameo scene or there's a 3-second camera shot during a crowd scene.

• All of your clothes have dog hair on them, even when they come back from the laundromat or dry cleaners.

• The only thing your friends, colleagues, and passing acquaintances say to you when they see you is, "How are the dogs?" or "How many dogs do you have now?"

• Your photo Christmas cards feature your dogs (humans optional).

DOG PET PEEVES ABOUT HUMANS

•  When you push me away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping.

• Blaming your farts on me...not funny.

• Yelling at me for barking...I'M A DOG !!

• How you naively believe that the stupid cat isn't all over everything while you're gone.

• Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out.  Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

• Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose...stop it.

• How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.

• Dog sweaters. Have you noticed the fur? Sheesh.

• Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.  Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

• When you pick up the crap piles in the yard. Do you realize how far behind schedule that puts me?

• Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back.

• The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw.  You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain